Urgency and Virtues of Adoption: The Permissible Adoption
Love and care of others and those in need is a central principle in Islam. This is the second in a series of articles on from the course Why Adopt? The Urgency, Virtues, and Practical Steps to Adoption.
There is no defined age when the child must be told. It depends on the circumstances, culture, context, and norms. The permissible adoption affirms actual parents and lineage. There are some legal distinctions from biological children with respect to some the derivative rulings concerning interaction and so on.
The underlying imperative to adopt, socially, should concern a believer. There are children in need of families that would take care of their well-being and raise and nurture them. That is the governing criterion.
There are tremendous merits that are mentioned concerning adoption (Kafala). In a broader context, it is not an accident that the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) was sent as an orphan. That is an example for us to consider.
Merits of Adoption
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) himself adopted initially but then that was adjusted as guardianship. There are numerous encouragements of our Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) with respect to guardianship. This was encouraged both with respect to boys and with respect to girls. One of the things in Arab society at that time was that a lot of people would adopt a son. The son would be a source of wealth.
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) highly encouraged adoption in general but also emphasized the particular merits of adopting girls as well.
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Whoever takes care of and raises two young girls until they reach adulthood, they will come on the day of resurrection and I’ll be with them.” And then he brought two fingers close together. That is how close they’ll be, referring to the tremendous reward. There was a great neglect of girls who needed adoption.
The scholars deduce from it as well that one pays particular attention to those categories of orphans that are more likely to be neglected. Narrated Sahl bin Sa‘d: The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “I and the person who looks after an orphan and provides for him, will be in Paradise like this,” putting his index and middle fingers together.
This is a category that the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) highly encouraged.
The Purpose of Religion
Adoption relates to the purpose of religion. We know from clear texts of both the Quran and the teachings of our Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) that the best of the servants of God are those who are of most benefit to the servants of God. The best of people are those of greatest benefit to others.
Allah is in the aid of His servant as long as His servant is in the aid of others. Whoever relieves from another a distress of the distresses of this life, Allah relieves from them distress in this life and the next.
All these general texts of being of benefit to others and being a source of relief for others all apply to adoption as well as all the texts of being of assistance to those in need.
It is also, of course, one of the qualities that the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) himself was deeply praised for. His uncle said of him that “He is the caretaker of orphans and the carer of widows.”
Care for Children
Even if you cannot adopt a child, assist those who are taking care of children. Spend on orphans, and assist those who are widowed and others who are disadvantaged. This is of the best of works. The Arabs and other societies were based on very tight-knit families and on tribal systems, if you were an orphan you were cut off.
Before the revelation, the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) reportedly asked Abu Talib for his daughter’s hand in marriage and he was refused. The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) encouraged socially to spend on orphans, and to express love for orphans, and there are many specific texts.
If you see an orphan, go and pat them on the head. You express love and care for an orphan and you never look at them with a look of scorn or disregard, etc. The Quranic ethos is to treat them as your own brothers and sisters.
Practical Reality
Sometimes, people imagine orphans are something that are found somewhere overseas. That is a secondary consideration. We have circles of responsibility. There are children in need of care, whether they be orphans from Muslim families or other families. At the very least, one should feel a sense of personal concern.
There is an opportunity which is that this is a source of tremendous reward if you adopt, but, it is also an obligation. The fact that they are not taken care of or are lacking care should trouble someone. If one can adopt oneself, there is tremendous merit in it. If one cannot adopt, then at least be part of raising awareness of it, assisting in it, and facilitating it. Even at a political level, what are the issues related to children, adoption, their proper care, funding etc.?
In many cases, adoption in the sense of guardianship, takes care of a very personal consideration that many people have. Someone may want to have a child which is a natural human urge. And if one is not able to have a child, this is one potential way of fulfilling that urge and wish. One may also have children but can no longer possibly have more children for whatever reason.
