Tying The Knot: The Interplay of Love, Faith, and Spiritual Growth – Shaykh Muhammad Carr
This is the fifth in a series of articles based on the On-Demand Course Tying the Knot: Rights, Responsibilities, and Balance. This course offers insights into the timeless wisdom of the Islamic teachings on marriage, helping couples and those preparing for marriage to embrace their roles with compassion, fairness, and spiritual mindfulness.
Marriage in Islam is more than a social contract; it is a means of completing one’s faith. The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) emphasized that through marriage, a believer strengthens their spirituality and moral character. This sacred union serves as a support system, guiding both partners toward righteousness and reinforcing their bond with Allah.
The Power of Partnership in Faith
When Prophet Musa (Peace be upon him) was sent to confront Pharaoh, he prayed to Allah, saying: “Put my brother Harun with me” [Quran, 20:29-30]. This request highlights the significance of companionship in fulfilling a divine mission. Similarly, in marriage, a spouse is not just a life partner but also a companion in faith, working together to achieve spiritual growth and divine closeness.
Many enter marriage seeking a good friend, someone who understands and supports them. However, a spouse offers more than friendship; they provide an opportunity to strengthen one’s faith. When both partners strive to grow spiritually, their relationship becomes a means of earning Allah’s pleasure.
The Interplay of Love, Faith, and Spiritual Growth
A marriage built on faith nurtures a profound connection between partners. When a couple prioritizes their relationship with Allah, their love for one another deepens. This connection influences every aspect of their life together, from acts of worship to their daily interactions.
Even intimacy, which is an essential part of marriage, plays a role in spiritual well-being. The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) taught that fulfilling one’s spouse’s needs in a halal (permissible) manner is a source of reward. This underscores the balance Islam promotes between physical and spiritual harmony in marriage.
The Symbolism of the Rib and Its Meaning
Islamic scholars often discuss the creation of woman from the rib of Adam (Peace be upon him). This analogy is not meant to diminish women but to highlight their natural inclination to lean towards their loved ones. A woman leans toward her father as a daughter, her husband as a wife, and her children as a mother.
Just as the rib protects vital organs, a wife supports and complements her husband. In turn, the husband must have the capacity—both emotionally and spiritually—to embrace and nurture this bond. This mutual complementarity strengthens the foundation of marriage and fosters an environment of love and respect.
Fulfilling Rights and Complementing Each Other
Marriage thrives when both partners fulfill their rights and obligations with a spirit of cooperation and understanding. The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) described a good spouse as a source of “beauty” in one’s life. A wife prays for a righteous husband, and a husband prays for a pious wife—both seeking beauty in their union through faith and devotion.
Marriage should not be seen as a battle of rights but as a partnership in fulfilling responsibilities. When partners focus on their duties rather than demanding their rights, harmony is achieved. Patience, kindness, and mutual support ensure a balanced and fulfilling relationship.
Obedience in Marriage: A Structured Framework
Islam outlines a structure where the husband assumes the role of a leader within the household. However, this leadership is not one of dominance but of responsibility and accountability before Allah. The Quran states: “Obey Allah, obey His Messenger, and those in charge among you” [Quran, 4:59]. This highlights a hierarchical system rooted in responsibility rather than oppression.
The role of a husband is akin to a leader who serves his family with wisdom and care. The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) said: “All of you are shepherds, and each of you is responsible for his flock”. [Bukhari, Muslim] Leadership in Islam is not about control but about being a just and compassionate caretaker.
Mutual Respect and Love in Marriage
A harmonious marriage is built upon love and respect. Women seek love and emotional security, while men desire respect and appreciation. The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) beautifully illustrated this balance by stating that if prostration were permissible to another human, he would have commanded a wife to prostrate before her husband—not as a sign of subjugation, but as a reflection of respect and gratitude.
Understanding and fulfilling each other’s emotional and spiritual needs ensures a lasting and fulfilling marriage. True beauty in marriage lies in the ability to complement one another, offer support, and walk the path of faith together.
Marriage in Islam is a means of strengthening one’s faith and fostering spiritual growth. By supporting each other, fulfilling rights with kindness, and maintaining a strong connection with Allah, couples can build a relationship that is both spiritually rewarding and emotionally fulfilling. Through love, respect, and faith, marriage becomes a journey toward achieving divine pleasure and completing one’s faith.
