I Have Cursed at My Son. Am I Divorced?

Answered by Shaykh Abdurragmaan Khan

Question: Assalam alaykum,

I got a little angry against my son and all of the sudden I uttered a word in the punjabi language: “haraam da” which means “bastard”.

And ever since it happend I have been getting misgivings of “kufr” and “divorce”.

Does this constitute disbelief or divorce?

Answer: Wa alaykum al-Salam

Shukran for your query.

Your statement does not constitute disbelief or divorce in any way. Children are a gift from Allah and should be shown love and affection. The regret and love you showed your son is beautiful and we all make mistakes. A beautiful guide for the upbringing and nurturing of children is the book, ‘Educating Children’ that was translated into English by Shaykh Abdul Aziz Ahmed. I strongly encourage you to read and study it.

May Allah bless you and your family.

Wassalam
[Shaykh] Abdurragmaan Khan

Shaykh Abdurragmaan received ijazah ’ammah from various luminaries, including but not restricted to: Habib Umar ibn Hafiz—a personality who affected him greatly and who has changed his relationship with Allah, Maulana Yusuf Karaan—the former Mufti of Cape Town; Habib ‘Ali al-Mashhur—the current Mufti of Tarim; Habib ‘Umar al-Jaylani—the Shafi‘i Mufti of Makkah; Sayyid Ahmad bin Abi Bakr al-Hibshi; Habib Kadhim as-Saqqaf; Shaykh Mahmud Sa’id Mamduh; Maulana Abdul Hafiz al-Makki; Shaykh Ala ad-Din al-Afghani; Maulana Fazlur Rahman al-Azami and Shaykh Yahya al-Gawthani amongst others.