Should I marry my boyfriend who has sinned in his past?
Question: I have a boyfriend who lived with his ex-girlfriend like a married couple and was sinful when he was schooling in South Africa, like smoking, drinking alcohol, and smoking weed. I don’t know if he sincerely repented. Is it good for me to marry him considering the ayah (An-nur 24:26) that evil women are for evil men and vice-versa?
Answer:
Assalamu alaykum,
Thank you for your question.
The full answer to your question is at this link:
https://seekers.flywheelstaging.com/answers/hanafi-fiqh/does-the-quran-prohibit-the-marriage-of-a-fornicator-and-a-non-fornicator/
The first step in your situation is to make tawba for having a boyfriend because it is haram. Rather, you should stop dating him, and he should propose marriage to you. If it is right for you, have your nikah, and if it is not, walk away. Ironically, you ask about marrying someone who has sinned before when you are currently sinning yourself.
Before marrying any man, you should consider whether he is suitable for you. Does he follow a religious lifestyle, and are you marrying him for religion, as the Prophet, may Allah bless him and give him peace, advised? Have you prayed istikhara about this? Please do, see this link:
https://seekers.flywheelstaging.com/answers/hanafi-fiqh/istikhara-the-prayer-of-seeking-guidance/
You say that you don’t know if he has repented; you must discuss whether he has sworn off alcohol or not. I would not recommend that you marry someone that might still be involved with substance abuse. If you are confident with your decision after praying istikhara and discussing your mutual religious practice, I pray that Allah bless your union and make it means for Allah’s good pleasure.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, Tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
