What Should I Do If I Cannot Find a Suitable Wife In My Area?


Question: I need nasiha (advice) on getting married. I am in an area where it is predominantly Salafi, and very few Muslims follow a madhhab. The only ones who do are foreigners, and they will not consider me because I am African American. I am working, and I have my own small apartment. I have been having a deep desire for marriage, and I want to protect myself from zina.

Answer:Assalamu alaykum,

Thank you for your question. May Allah reward you for trying hard to protect yourself and not resorting to sin. I pray that Allah facilitates marriage for you and blesses you for your sincerity.

 

Finding a Wife

The best advice that I can give you is found at these links:
https://seekers.flywheelstaging.com/answers/general-counsel/advice-give-find-spouse/
https://seekers.flywheelstaging.com/answers/general-counsel/difficulty-in-finding-a-spouse-and-losing-hope/

 

Steps

In summary from the links above, try these steps:

-Pray the Prayer of Need in the last third of the night and ask Allah to help you find a religious match for you. Say this du’a from the Qur’an daily:

رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا.

“Our Lord! Grant unto us spouses and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous.” (25:74)-Inform your local imam, friends, and extended family that you are looking for a spouse. I know more than one Muslim couple that was matched by a non-Muslim friend!
-Join online lessons and circles in order to put your name out there or become familiar with a like-minded sister.
-Attend the mosque as much as you can
-Volunteer for Muslim charitable servicesDo all of the above with the intention to obey Allah, follow the Sunnah, help the Muslims, and open a door to finding a wife. I pray that Allah gives you the best and blesses your union with a pious woman. Trust in Him and He will not abandon you.[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.