Is There Any Specific Prayer To Make Someone Want To Marry You?

Answered by Shaykh Irshaad Sedick

Question 

I am interested in marrying my friend, but I have no idea whether he likes me or not. I used to pray to Allah to stop having feelings for this man. It worked for a short time, but now the feelings are back, and I don’t understand why.

I admire his piety and admirable qualities, and I found myself praying to Allah to make me his wife. Is there any specific prayer to make someone want to marry you?

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate. May Allah guide our hearts, tongues, and deeds to that which perpetually pleases Him.

It is permissible for you to pray to Allah to bless you with marriage to the man you like. However, we strongly recommend that you also pray for Allah to bless you with the best husband for you and grant you contentment with His Decree.

We suggest that you do not give your heart away to a man until you have married (completed your nikah). Deep and lasting love can blossom after nikah, within the safety of your marriage.

Marriage

We encourage you to learn more about what it takes to have a successful Islamic marriage. This way, no matter who you marry, you will have the right tools to navigate the next stage of your life.

Please Read Before You Tie The Knot and listen to the Getting Married lesson set.

Specific Prayer

There is no specific prayer to “make someone want to marry you,” but we could recommend a few prayers that would be more beneficial in sha Allah.

Prayer of Seeking Goodness (istikhara)

The Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and give him peace) taught his Companions (may Allah be pleased with them) to seek goodness (pray istikhara) in all things, in the same way, that he taught them passages from the Qur’an. 

The Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and give him peace) said: “If any of you is concerned about a decision he has to make, then let him pray two cycles (rakaʿat) of non-obligatory prayer, then say: 

اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْتَخِيرُكَ بِعِلْمِكَ وَأَسْتَقْدِرُكَ بِقُدْرَتِكَ وَأَسْأَلُكَ مِنْ فَضْلِكَ ، فَإِنَّكَ تَقْدِرُ وَلا أَقْدِرُ وَتَعْلَمُ وَلا أَعْلَمُ وَأَنْتَ عَلامُ الْغُيُوبِ اللَّهُمَّ فَإِنْ كُنْتَ تَعْلَمُ هَذَا الأَمْرَ…

 (then it should be mentioned by name) خَيْرًا لِي فِي عَاجِلِ أَمْرِي وَآجِلِهِ ق أَوْ فِي دِينِي وَمَعَاشِي وَعَاقِبَةِ أَمْرِي فَاقْدُرْهُ لِي وَيَسِّرْهُ لِي ثُمَّ بَارِكْ لِي فِيهِ اللَّهُمَّ وَإِنْ كُنْتَ تَعْلَمُ أَنَّهُ شَرٌّ لِي فِي دِينِي وَمَعَاشِي وَعَاقِبَةِ أَمْرِي أَوْ فِي عَاجِلِ أَمْرِي وَآجِلِهِ فَاصْرِفْنِي عَنْهُ [ واصرفه عني] وَاقْدُرْ لِي الْخَيْرَ حَيْثُ كَانَ ثُمَّ رَضِّنِي بِهِ

Allahumma inni astakhiruka bi ʿilmika wa astaqdiruka bi qudratika wa asaluka min fadlika, fa innaka taqdiru wa la aqdir, wa taʿlamu wa la ʿalam, wa anta ʿallam al-ghuyub. Allahumma fa in kunta taʿlamu anna hadhal-amra (then the matter should be mentioned by name) khayrun li fi ajil amri wa ʿajilihi (or: fi dini wa maʿashi wa ʿaqibati amri) faqdurhu li wa yassirhu li thumma baarik li fihi. Allahumma wa in kunta taʿlamu annahu sharrun li fi dini wa maʿashi wa ʿaqibati amri (or: fi ajili amri wa ʿajilihi) fasrifni ʿanhu [wasrafhu ʿanni] waqdur li al-khayr haythu kana thumma radini bihi 

Oh, Allah, I seek Your guidance [in making a choice] by Your knowledge, and I seek ability by Your power, and I ask You of Your great bounty. You have power; I have none. And You know, I know not. You are the Knower of hidden things. O Allah, if in Your knowledge, this matter (then it should be mentioned by name) is good for me both in this world and in the Hereafter (or: in my religion, my livelihood, and my affairs), then ordain it for me, make it easy for me, and bless it for me. And if in Your knowledge it is bad for me and my religion, my livelihood and my affairs (or: for me both in this world and the next), then turn me away from it, [and turn it away from me], and ordain for me the good wherever it may be and make me pleased with it. [Bukhari, Tirmidhi, Nasa’i, Abu Dawud, Ibn Maja and Ahmad].

Try to remain objective when saying this prayer and trust that Allah will guide you to what is best for you, Amin.

One could also say the following prayers from the Qur’an to seek guidance from Allah towards finding the most suitable spouse:

Allah says: 

﴿وَالَّذِينَ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا٧٤﴾ [الفرقان: 74] 

And those who say, “Our Lord, grant us from among our spouses and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.” [Qur’an 25:74]

Allah says:

﴿فَسَقَى لَهُمَا ثُمَّ تَوَلَّى إِلَى الظِّلِّ فَقَالَ رَبِّ إِنِّي لِمَا أَنْزَلْتَ إِلَيَّ مِنْ خَيْرٍ فَقِيرٌ٢٤﴾ [القصص: 24] 

So he (Prophet Musa) watered [their flocks] for them; then he went back to the shade and said, “My Lord, indeed I am, for whatever good You would send down to me, in need.” [Qur’an 28:24]

Next Steps

Prayer is your first step, then take action. Please speak to your family to address his family directly and establish whether there is any interest from him. Our mother, Sayyida Khadija (may Allah be pleased with her), proposed to the Prophet (may Allah bless him and give him peace) through an intermediary. There is nothing wrong with taking the first step. Whether he expresses interest or not, you will know where you stand and can either move forward or move on, and Allah knows best.

I pray this is of benefit and that Allah guides us all.

[Shaykh] Irshaad Sedick

Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Shaykh Irshaad Sedick was raised in South Africa in a traditional Muslim family. He graduated from Dar al-Ulum al-Arabiyyah al-Islamiyyah in Strand, Western Cape, under the guidance of the late world-renowned scholar, Shaykh Taha Karaan. 

Shaykh Irshaad received Ijaza from many luminaries of the Islamic world, including Shaykh Taha Karaan, Mawlana Yusuf Karaan, and Mawlana Abdul Hafeez Makki, among others.

He is the author of the text “The Musnad of Ahmad ibn Hanbal: A Hujjah or not?” He has served as the Director of the Discover Islam Centre and Al Jeem Foundation. He served as the resident Imam of Masjid al-Munowar in Retreat, Cape Town, for several years.

Shaykh Irshaad has thirteen years of teaching experience at some of the leading Islamic institutes in Cape Town). He is currently building an Islamic online learning and media platform called ‘Isnad Academy’ and pursuing his Master’s degree in the study of Islam at the University of Johannesburg. He has a keen interest in healthy living and fitness.