Can a Husband Prevent His Wife from Visiting Her “Godparents” and Their Children?

Answered by Ustadha Zaynab Ansari

Question: I have a question regarding a Muslim revert and I would like your opinion about it.

This sister grew up in a Catholic household and had Catholic godparents that she grew up with closely. When she married her husband and became Muslim, he did not want her to have any more contact with her godparents or their children. As you can imagine, this has been a struggle because she wants to do what her husband wants, but she doesn’t want to cut ties with what she grew up knowing as her family.

What is the Islamic ruling on her situation. Can she still occasionally visit them in their home (of course while upholding proper hijab guidelines)?

Answer: In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Dear Sister,

Assalamu alaikum,

I pray this message finds you well.

Unless the sister’s godparents are a negative influence, the husband has no basis for preventing her from seeing them. In fact, one of the signs of an unhealthy relationship is when one spouse seeks to undermine the other’s relationship with family members or longstanding friends. This is usually an attempt at control.

The sister needs to reassure her husband that this relationship is meaningful to her and will not negatively impact her practice of Islam.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and give him peace, says, “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him maintain the bonds of kinship.” (Bukhari)

While godparents may not technically be kin, the husband should understand that in Western culture, godparents are considered to be as close as relatives and that cutting those ties is deemed very offensive.

May Allah reward you,

Zaynab Ansari