Is It Haram to Give Information to the Animist Father of a Prospective Bride?
Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
Question
Can a Muslim couple provide the suitor’s parents’ names to the woman’s animist father, who wants to consult ancestors for guidance before approving their marriage?
Answer
Thank you for your question. It would be impermissible to assist in the sin of animism, so please avoid giving their names.
Parents and Shirk
Allah Most High has told Muslim children what to do when their parents engage in shirk,
“But if they pressure you to associate with Me what you have no knowledge of, do not obey them. Still keep their company in this world courteously, and follow the way of those who turn to Me ˹in devotion˺. Then to Me, you will ˹all˺ return, and then I will inform you of what you used to do..” [Quran, 31:15]
Animism
Animism is a form of shirk (associating partners with Allah) because animists believe that all things have a soul, life force, or spirit, that the spirits of deceased loved ones can influence daily life, and that the world is full of spirit beings that can help or hinder human endeavors. However, we know that none can benefit or harm except Allah Most High.
Allah Most High has told us in the Quran, “Say, ‘None in the heavens and earth knows the unseen except Allah.’” [Quran, 27:65]
And Allah Most High has told us in the Quran, “Yet they worship besides Allah what can neither benefit nor harm them. And the disbeliever always collaborates against their Lord.” [Quran, 25:55]
And in the Quran, Ibrahim asked his people about the idols: “Or can they benefit or harm you?” [Quran, 26:73]
Tips
- Be respectful and ask the father to pray istikhara about the matter
- You may give the names intending asking him to make dua
- Pray istikhara yourselves
- Consider whether this family is appropriate for you to marry into and ask if this man’s daughter has been influenced by animism.
Dua
Please say this prophetic supplication and perhaps send it to the animist:
اللّهُـمَّ إِنّـي أَعـوذُبِكَ أَنْ أُشْـرِكَ بِكَ وَأَنا أَعْـلَمْ، وَأَسْتَـغْفِرُكَ لِما لا أَعْـلَم
O Allah, I seek refuge in You lest I associate anything with You knowingly, and I seek Your forgiveness for what I know not. [Ahmad]
Please see these links as well:
- Should I Tell My Suitors That My Father Is Addicted to Gambling?
- I Hate My Future Wife’s Father
- How Can One Repent from Shirk, and What Role Do Good Deeds Play?
- Exploring Tawhid: Islam as a Universal Civilization
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Irshaad Sedick
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied ‘aqida, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
