How Should I Navigate Being a Non-Salafi in a Salafi Family?
Answered by Mawlana Ilyas Patel
Question
I am 16. I thank Allah that I was born and raised in a devout Muslim family, regardless of aqida. However, I have realized the grave errors the Salafi movement has made in matters of theology and the deviance of Ibn Taymiyya from the majority of Ahl-al Sunnah, a person my family reveres. My family does not know of my abandonment of this creed; I fear banishment and severance of ties should they find out.
Praise be to Allah, I am interested in pursuing a future religious education. It is unthinkable that I would propagate Salafism; yet, I am sure to be rejected should I not. I fear my parents refusing to marry me to a non-Salafi or instilling Salafism in my children. It seems I cannot keep this a secret forever. What should I do?
Answer
In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate.
I pray you are in good faith and health. Thank you for your question and for having a mature and sound understanding at a young age.
Continue with Respect and Wisdom
Speak to your parents respectfully and politely about this topic and ask them to hear you out sometimes, even if they disagree. Can you practice what you know without displaying it outwardly all the time? Can you go out to learn but come back within the limits that they set?
Seek Knowledge
It would be permissible for you to seek correct and authentic traditional knowledge of Islam, but you would do better to do it without breaking their hearts. Take online classes. Start taking online Arabic and Islamic classes from SeekersGuidance, starting from level one and working your way up.
Mu‘awiya (Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “If Allah intends goodness for someone, he gives him an understanding of the religion.” [Bukhari]
In another narration, the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “O people, knowledge only comes by learning, and understanding only comes by seeking understanding. For whoever Allah intends good, he gives him an understanding of the religion. Verily, only those with knowledge fear Allah among his servants.” [Quran, 35:28] [Tabarani, Al-Mujam al-Kabir]
Regular Dua and Good Company
Continue by making regular dua and good company, and time; they will come around; perhaps the truth will come to them through you and your future spouse or even your children.
May Allah Most High enable you with success and ease for you to remain steadfast in seeking knowledge and truth and make you a means to spread the light of the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) and to be one of the inheritors of His, in sha’ Allah.
I would like you to go through the valuable answers and links below. You will receive guidance and direction, in sha’ Allah.
Related:
- All you need to know about whether to follow a madhab
- Knowledge and Guidance: A Comprehensive SeekersGuidance Reader
- When May Parents Be Disobeyed, and How?
- Promise to one’s parents
- How Does One Perform The Prayer Of Need (salat al-haja)?
Why not begin your search for knowledge by signing up for a course for the Islamic Studies Curriculum and Arabic Language Curriculum?
I pray this helps with your question.
Wassalam,
[Mawlana] Ilyas Patel
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Mawlana Ilyas Patel is a traditionally trained scholar who has studied in the UK, India, Pakistan, Syria, Jordan, and Turkey. He started his early education in the UK. He went on to complete the hifz of the Quran in India, then enrolled in an Islamic seminary in the UK, where he studied the secular and ‘Aalimiyya sciences. He then traveled to Karachi, Pakistan. He has been an Imam in Rep of Ireland for several years. He has taught hifz of the Quran, Tajwid, Fiqh, and many other Islamic sciences to children and adults onsite and online extensively in the UK and Ireland. He taught at a local Islamic seminary for 12 years in the UK, where he was a librarian and a teacher of Islamic sciences. He currently resides in the UK with his wife. His interest is a love of books and gardening.
