How Can I Embrace Islam While Addressing Past Struggles, Family Concerns, and My Passion for Music?
Answered by Shaykh Irshaad Sedick
Question
I am drawn to Islam but have concerns about my past sexual experiences, struggles with pornography, and expectations in marriage. Additionally, I worry about my family’s reaction to conversion and the Islamic ruling on music, which is central to my life as a pianist. How can I navigate these challenges?
Answer
A Journey Toward Islam with Hope and Trust in Allah (Most High)
First, know that Islam welcomes all who seek guidance and forgiveness, regardless of their past. Allah (Most High) says: Say, ˹O Prophet,˺ “O My servants who have exceeded the limits against their souls! Do not lose hope in Allah’s mercy, for Allah certainly forgives all sins. He is indeed the All-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [Quran, 39:53]
Entering Islam wipes away all past sins, granting you a fresh start and enabling you to strive for righteousness.
Overcoming Past Struggles
Islam emphasizes sincere repentance (tawba) for past mistakes. The steps include feeling remorse, ceasing the harmful act, and resolving not to return to it. Seek help for overcoming pornography by engaging in activities that replace this habit with beneficial pursuits, such as learning Islamic knowledge or developing new skills.
The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) said: “The one who repents from sin is like one who has not sinned.” [Ibn Maja]
Navigating Family Concerns
Conversion to Islam may be challenging for family members. Approach the matter with patience and wisdom. Demonstrate through your character the positive impact of Islam on your life. Engage them with love and kindness, as Allah (Most High) says: “And We have commanded people to honor their parents. But if they urge you to associate with Me what you have no knowledge of, then do not obey them. To Me is your return, and I will inform you of what you used to do.” [Quran, 29:8]
Maintaining family ties is highly emphasized in Islam, even if they disagree with your faith.
Expectations in Marriage
Marriage in Islam is based on mutual respect, understanding, and shared goals of seeking Allah’s pleasure. Focus on developing qualities like kindness, patience, and responsibility. Your past does not define your future; rather, it is your intention and effort to reform that matters. Seek a partner who values your journey and shares your commitment to a God-centered life.
The Ruling on Music and Your Career as a Pianist
Islamic scholars have diverse opinions on music, and you may view the Shafi‘i School here. Some music, particularly that which does not lead to sinful behavior, may be permissible. You may explore Islamic arts or alternative careers aligned with your values while contributing positively to society.
Practical Steps Moving Forward
– Seek knowledge by studying Islam through reliable sources or attending classes.
– Build a relationship with Allah (Most High) through prayer and dhikr (remembrance of Allah).
– Find supportive Muslim communities or mentors to guide you through your journey.
– Prioritize gradual changes rather than overwhelming yourself with all aspects of practice at once.
A Final Note on Courage and Commitment
Allah (Most High) does not burden a soul beyond its capacity [Quran, 2:286]. Trust that your sincere efforts will be met with ease and blessings. Embrace Islam with confidence, knowing that every step you take toward Allah will bring immense rewards and guidance.
May Allah (Most High) make your journey into Islam smooth, bless you with wisdom in dealing with challenges, and grant you success in this life and the next.
[Shaykh] Irshaad Sedick
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Mohammad Abu Bakr Badhib
Shaykh Irshaad Sedick was raised in South Africa in a traditional Muslim family. He graduated from Dar al-Ulum al-Arabiyyah al-Islamiyyah in Strand, Western Cape, under the guidance of the late world-renowned scholar Shaykh Taha Karaan (Allah have mercy on him), where he taught.
Shaykh Irshaad received Ijaza from many luminaries of the Islamic world, including Shaykh Taha Karaan, Shaykh Muhammad Awama, Shaykh Muhammad Hasan Hitu, and Mawlana Abdul Hafeez Makki, among others.
He is the author of the text “The Musnad of Ahmad ibn Hanbal: A Hujjah or not?” He has been the Director of the Discover Islam Centre, and for six years, he has been the Khatib of Masjid Ar-Rashideen, Mowbray, Cape Town.
Shaykh Irshaad has fifteen years of teaching experience at some of the leading Islamic institutes in Cape Town). He is currently building an Islamic podcast, education, and media platform called ‘Isnad Academy’ and has completed his Master’s degree in the study of Islam at the University of Johannesburg. He has a keen interest in healthy Prophetic living and fitness.
