Is One Allowed to Consensually Degrade or Insult a Spouse during Intercourse?
Answered by Ustada Shazia Ahmad
Question
How to talk to your partner during sexual intercourse? Is it allowed to insult and degrade your partner at his or her request if it is part of the game and both are aware that it is only that? This would only happen during sexual intercourse. Of course, the whole thing presupposes that both agree with it and need/do it in order to be fulfilled and aroused. Both of them do not see it as harmful to the relationship, their self-esteem, etc.
Answer
Insults
It was narrated that `A’isha said: “I never saw the Messenger of Allah Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) insulting anyone, and no garment was ever folded up for him.” [Ibn Maja]
I urge the couple not to behave in this manner, eventually, they would tire of it anyway and stop enjoying it. One’s God-given fitra (innate predisposition) is not in line with this and it is potentially sinful, at the very least disliked.
Please see these links as well:
Is Violence During Intercourse Allowed?
[Ustada] Shazia Ahmad