Do I Need to Inform a Prospective Spouse about My unIslamic Thoughts?
Answered by Ustada Shazia Ahmad
Question
I have some degree of sexual thoughts and some physical attraction for individuals I don’t want to. Included in this, are people of any age (young kids included), same gender, mahram, and non-mahram. I have thoughts and degrees of physical attraction that I wish I didn’t. Generally, it’s small but even a little bit is concerning to me. I close off thoughts of this when they come. My primary attraction is towards adults of the opposite gender, which is all I want. I don’t know what to do, and is this something I need to disclose to a potential spouse? I know this is a test from Allah Most High, and I want to be a normal Muslim with normal interactions and be able to give my friends and family a hug and so forth.
Answer
Spouse
There is no need to inform a future spouse about this, you would be turning nothing into something and giving a false impression about yourself. The devil is whispering ideas to you and they are HIS ideas, not YOURS. Seek refuge from him at the outset of every thought, and with continuous dhikr and internal struggle (jihad), and by Allah’s grace, they will stop. Thank Allah every day that the thoughts are not worse, and that you don’t act upon them.
Please see these links as well:
[Ustada]
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria for two years where she studied aqida, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Masters in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
