What Can I Do to Convince a Muslim Man’s Parents to Let Me Marry Their Son?
Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
Question
I would like to convert to Islam and get married to this Muslim man, but his parents don’t allow him to be with me because I’m not Muslim and not from his country. I’m a Christian but I would like to be a Muslim, even though Islam allows him to be with a Christian. His parents are only focusing on the fact that I’m not from his country; he is from Gambia and I’m from Nigeria. We both really want to be together but I don’t know how we can convince his parents.
Answer
Thank you for your question. May you be rewarded for wanting to do things in the right way for his religion and his parents, and may He facilitate a path for you to every happiness.
Parents
Although it is permissible for him to marry you now, as a Christian and without his parent’s consent, it is not wise, and I commend him for it. The best thing that you can do is convert now (whether you marry him or not), start practicing Islam, meet his parents, talk to them openly and honestly, and pray that Allah Most High opens an easy path for you.
After you become Muslim, I encourage you to pray the Prayer of Istikhara (a prayer for seeking guidance about a decision) regarding marrying this man and proceed from there. I also encourage you to study Islam and apply what you can in your life. Surely, your sincerity will shine through, and it will bring you many blessings and goodness, regardless of what is decreed for you regarding marriage.
Only Gain, No Loss
The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said: “If a person accepts Islam, such that his Islam is good, Allah will decree reward for every good deed that he did before, and every bad deed that he did before will be erased. Then after that will come the reckoning; each good deed will be rewarded ten times up to seven hundred times. And each bad deed will be recorded as it is, unless Allah, the Mighty and Sublime, forgives it.” [Nasa’i]
Please see these links as well:
- New to Islam Reader: A Trusted Collection of Resources for Converts
- Can I Marry Someone Who Is Ready to Accept Islam for Marriage?
- Marrying a Non-Muslim Interested in Islam
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin and completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.
