Why Was the Woman Reportedly Disrespectful to the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace)?
Answered by Shaykh Irshaad Sedick
Question
I came across a hadith [Bukhari, 5255] in which a woman seeks refuge in Allah (Most High) from the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) in front of him. In the hadith, the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) asks the woman to gift herself to him, and she responds rudely.
I would like to know whether this narration is authentic and how to understand it.
Answer
In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate. May Allah alleviate our difficulties and guide us to what pleases Him. Amin.
The hadith, as you mentioned, is from the Sahih of Imam Bukhari and, therefore, authentic. The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) married a woman based on her father’s testimony. Still, he discovered she was mentally challenged and released her before consummating the marriage.
The Hadith
The hadith in question appears several times in Bukhari’s Sahih. The first time appears in the Book of Divorce (Chapter: “Whoever divorced (his wife), and should a man tell his wife face to face that she is divorced”). The Hadith reads as follows:
It is related that Abu Usayd said, we went out with the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) until we reached a walled garden called Al-Shawt and sat down between two walls.
The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, ‘Sit here,’ and he went in. The Jauniyya woman Umayma bint Al-Nu’man Ibn Sharahil [who the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) had married] was brought and lodged in a house among the date palms. Her wet nurse had accompanied her as a governess.
When the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) came to her, he said, ‘Give yourself to me.’ She replied, ‘Can a queen give herself to a layman?’ He stretched his hand to her to calm her, and she said, ‘I seek refuge with Allah from you!’ He said, ‘You have sought refuge with the Refuge.’
Then he came out to us and said, ‘Abu Usayd, give her two long white linen garments and take her back to her family.’
Basic Explanation
The marriage between the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) and Jauniyya were arranged by her father before she came to Madina. After becoming a widow, her father claimed that she was interested in the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace), and they agreed on a dower of five hundred silver coins.
However, Jauniyya was mentally challenged, and her behavior was strange when the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) first came to her. [Ibn Hajar, Fath al-Bari]
According to reports in Sahih Bukhari and other sources, the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) tried approaching Jauniyya, but she refused and asked him to come to her instead.
When he did, she uttered an isti‘adha seeking refuge from him (Allah bless him and give him peace). This made it clear to the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) that despite her father’s claim, Jauniyya was not interested in marriage and was not well-suited to it due to her mental condition.
As a result, the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) sent Jauniyya back to her family, effectively divorcing her. Some suggest that the woman preparing Jauniyya for the meeting may have realized the gravity of her condition and made her say something that made the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) understand her mental condition.
However, the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) did not just send Jauniyya back; he also gifted her two garments, indicating that his decision was a carefully considered action and not just a momentary response.
Ultimately, only Allah knows the actual reasons behind the events that occurred.
I pray this is of benefit and that Allah guides us all.
[Shaykh] Irshaad Sedick
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Shaykh Irshaad Sedick was raised in South Africa in a traditional Muslim family. He graduated from Dar al-Ulum al-Arabiyyah al-Islamiyyah in Strand, Western Cape, under the guidance of the late world-renowned scholar, Shaykh Taha Karaan.
Shaykh Irshaad received Ijaza from many luminaries of the Islamic world, including Shaykh Taha Karaan, Mawlana Yusuf Karaan, and Mawlana Abdul Hafeez Makki, among others.
He is the author of the text “The Musnad of Ahmad ibn Hanbal: A Hujjah or not?” He has served as the Director of the Discover Islam Centre and Al Jeem Foundation. For the last five years till present, he has served as the Khatib of Masjid Ar-Rashideen, Mowbray, Cape Town.
Shaykh Irshaad has thirteen years of teaching experience at some of the leading Islamic institutes in Cape Town). He is currently building an Islamic online learning and media platform called ‘Isnad Academy’ and has completed his Master’s degree in the study of Islam at the University of Johannesburg. He has a keen interest in healthy living and fitness.
