What Is the Ruling of Purposely Not Replying to Chats for a Valid Reason?
Answered by Mawlana Ilyas Patel
Question
I made a Muslim friend online, but she betrayed my trust. Her lies have put me through psychological turmoil for almost half a year. I already forgave her, but her presence disturbed me so much that I don’t think I can ever trust her again after what she did.
Can I put her messages in a restricted section (never going to see any of her messages again)? But I don’t plan to ignore her if we ever meet in person. I want to limit my interaction with her to face-to-face interaction only. Is it okay if I avoid her at all costs on all online platforms (even if she can see me using those platforms in other means, sample she sees me online sharing posts)?
Answer
In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful and Compassionate.
I pray you are in good faith and health. Thank you for your question.
In general, one can stop talking to someone if they have wronged you. In this case, you can block her messages and avoid her on social platforms and intend to embrace and meet her face-to-face. Social platforms are mostly emotionless and create and generate misunderstandings and abuse.
A Muslim May Stop Talking to Others for Three Days
‘Aisha (Allah be pleased with her) reported the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “A Muslim may not boycott another Muslim for more than three days. Then, if he meets him, greets him with peace three times, and he receives no response, the sin falls back on the one still boycotting.” [Abu Dawud]
Speak as You Like to Be Spoken To
Harmala Ibn Abdullah (Allah be pleased with him) reported: I said, “O Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace), what do you command me to do?” The Messenger of Allah said, “O Harmala, do what is good and avoid what is evil. Consider what you are pleased to hear people say to you; when you stand to leave them, behave this way. Consider what you dislike to hear people say to you; when you stand to leave them, avoid doing it.” When I went back, I reflected on it and found that these two sayings did not leave anything out. [Bukhari, al-Adab al-Mufrad]
Related:
- Is It Permissible for Me to Stop Talking to a Harmful Family Member?
- Should I Maintain the Ties of a Difficult Friendship?
- Importance of Speech – Birgivi’s The Path of Muhammad Explained
- What Are the Qualities of a Friend?
I pray this helps with your question.
Wassalam,
[Mawlana] Ilyas Patel
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
Mawlana Ilyas Patel is a traditionally-trained scholar who has studied in the UK, India, Pakistan, Syria, Jordan, and Turkey. He started his early education in the UK. He went on to complete the hifz of the Quran in India, then enrolled in an Islamic seminary in the UK, where he studied the secular and ‘Aalimiyya sciences. He then traveled to Karachi, Pakistan. He has been an Imam in Rep of Ireland for several years. He has taught hifz of the Quran, Tajwid, Fiqh, and many other Islamic sciences to children and adults onsite and online extensively in the UK and Ireland. He taught at a local Islamic seminary for 12 years in the UK, where he was a librarian and a teacher of Islamic sciences. He currently resides in the UK with his wife. His interest is a love of books and gardening.
