How Can I Help My Suicidal Friend Who Is Losing Her Faith?

Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad

Question

I have known my best friend for around ten years. Before, she wasn’t practicing Islam, but she gave importance to the rules of Islam. Three years ago, she went through great difficulty and became a practicing Muslim. She almost started the hijab. She also gave me hope and told me to trust Allah.

But this year, she says that she is losing her faith. She couldn’t complete her studies due to deteriorating mental health, and she was suicidal for the past few years. She became socially isolated recently and told me Islam is no longer her faith. I am very worried about her; only Allah knows our hearts after death.

What can I do on my part to help her?

Answer

Thank you for your question. May Allah reward you for being a good friend to her and for your concern and care, may Allah grant you a good friend in your time of need, too.

Supplication

The first thing that you, and she, should do is to ask Allah for help. Ask Him for guidance on what to do, ask Him to bring back her faith, and to guide you in helping her. Allah can make everything change no matter how difficult, and He has power that encompasses all. You can pray the Prayer of Need for her. Some other religious works that will help her are giving charity on her behalf and donating the reward of Quranic recitation to her.

You can say this dua and add into your supplication in English that you are asking this for yourself and for your friend.

”اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنَ الهَمِّ وَالحَزَنِ، وَالعَجْزِ وَالكَسَلِ، وَالبُخْلِ وَالجُبْنِ، وَضَلَعِ الدَّيْنِ، وَغَلَبَةِ الرِّجَالِ.“

“O Allah, I seek refuge in you from grief and sadness, from weakness and from laziness, from miserliness and from cowardice, from being overcome by debt and overpowered by men (i.e. others).” [Bukhari]

Steps

Outside of this, you can try these steps:

• Talk to her or to her parents about getting her a therapist or psychiatrist;
• Have her speak to a local imam, elder, or other wise people that she can benefit from;
• Invite her over or go out with her for your positive influence, especially if she feels happy and calm in your presence;
• Encourage her to exercise and get fresh air, perhaps work out with her;
• Lend her an ear so she has someone to talk to about her problems;
• Try these tips as well: What to Say to Someone Who Is Suicidal?

Remind her of this inspiring Hadith Qudsi: Allah’s Messenger (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Every night when it is the last third of the night, our Lord, the Superior, the Blessed, descends to the nearest heaven and says: Is there anyone to invoke Me that I may respond to his invocation? Is there anyone to ask Me so that I may grant him his request? Is there anyone asking My forgiveness so that I may forgive him?” [Bukhari]

May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied aqidah, fiqh, tajweed, tafsir, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin and completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She later moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.