Should I Delete All the Posts That I See in Our Family Messaging Group?

Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad

Question

In our family WhatsApp group, my parents and I are admins, allowing us to delete messages. My father occasionally shares sinful content like music videos. I refrain from deleting them to avoid conflict and maintain our relationship. Should I delete these messages or silently object and leave them in the group, considering the risk of retaliation if I delete them?

Answer

Thank you for your question. No, it is not sinful for you to leave the messages on the group, as forbidding evil comes with certain conditions.

Forbidding evil

The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Whoever among you sees an evil, let him change it with his hand; if he cannot, then with his tongue; if he cannot, then with his heart- and that is the weakest of Faith.” [Nasa’i]

Commanding the good and forbidding the evil in Islam is obligatory under certain conditions only. The situation you describe doesn’t obligate you to delete his messages because it will cause resentment and damage your relationship. Bringing your father closer to Islam through excellence, kindness, and love is superior.
Your best bet might be to comment on what he says or send religious talks on the subject to ensure that your family gets correct exposure to Islam or silence altogether.

The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Allah is gentle and loves gentleness, and He grants reward for it that He does not grant for harshness.” [Ibn Maja]

Please see more details here about when to forbid evil:

What Are the Criteria for Enjoining Good and Forbidding Evil?

What is the right approach to commanding the good?

Can You Clarify the Criteria for Enjoining Good and Forbidding Evil?

Du`a

Please make this du`a from the Quran daily:

       اللَّهُمَ حَبَّبْ إِلَيْنَا الْإِيمَانَ وَزَيِّنْهُ فِي قُلُوبِنَا، وَكَرِّهْ إِلَيْنَا الْكُفْرَ وَالْفُسُوقَ وَالْعِصْيَانَ، وَاجْعَلْنَا مِنَ الرَّاشِدِينَ 

O Allah, make our faith beloved to us, beautify it in our hearts, and make hateful to us disbelief, wickedness, and disobedience. And make us of the rightly guided. [from Quran, 49:7]

Please see these links as well:

If I Posted an Unlawful Message, Should the Whole Group Be Deleted?

Do I Have To Remove Immoral Comments Online?

Is It Permissible to Correct Parents, and What Is the Best Way?

Should I Stop Correcting My Mother and Just Love Her?

How Can I Guide My Parents to the Right Path?

May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.

[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani

Ustadha Shazia Ahmad lived in Damascus, Syria, for two years, where she studied Aqidah, Fiqh, Tajweed, Tafseer, and Arabic. She then attended the University of Texas at Austin, where she completed her Master’s in Arabic. Afterward, she moved to Amman, Jordan, where she studied Fiqh, Arabic, and other sciences. She recently moved back to Mississauga, Canada, where she lives with her family.